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WIMBLEDON WEEK
Frazzled we sweltered,
dazzled we sheltered
as the storm raged
in the sky overhead.
First days of July
were extraordinarily hot.
Dog didn’t like it a lot
and neither did I.
Tennis playing Brits
were cooked to bits,
dead beat in the heat
and most died in defeat.
http://www.writersdigest.com/whats-new/wednesday-poetry-prompts-312/comment-page-2#comment-3561112
ABSENTMINDEDNESS
A Terzanelle Poem
I have this secret to share:
she cannot find her glasses.
I know exactly where
and as time passes
she’ll find them again.
She cannot find her glasses
she has a mixed-up brain.
She is so absent-minded.
She’ll find them again,
they’re actually on her head!
She can keep secrets:
she is so absent-minded,
but she never forgets
where she’s hidden her wine.
She can keep secrets
I will not keep mine.
I have this secret to share:
where she’s hidden her wine
I know exactly where.
Extract from writersdigest.com 2015 April PAD Challenge, day 2:- Terzanelle Poetic Form
What do you get when you mix two super popular Italian poetic forms, specifically the terza rima and villanelle? The terzanelle, of course!
It combines the lyricism of the terza rima with the repetition of the villanelle to make a powerful one-two punch in only 19 lines. The traditional stance on the terzanelle is that the lines should be written in a consistent iambic meter, but there are plenty of contemporary terzanelles that just aspire to keep the lines a consistent length throughout.
Here’s the rhyme and refrain order for the Terzanelle: Continue reading
PURPLE
Aubergine’s not a veg it’s a fruit
but that colour will do for my suit
cos I can’t find the right shade of purple.
Damson is downright too dark
even blackberry don’t hit the mark
for I can’t find the right shade of purple.
Grape is graceful but blue,
Hyacinth has an hypnotic hue,
Indigo is indirectly purple.
Just cannot find a duller
Kaleidoscope of colour.
Lavender and lilac look too pale,
Magenta’s mostly on the nail.
Nothing even rhymes with purple.
Oh I wish I could find
Purple of the right kind.
Queer shades of puce
Really are no use.
Some shades are too pink
The others too blue. I think
Under ultraviolet light
Violet doesn’t look quite right.
When I’m old I’ll wear purple
Xcept when I wear black.
You can expect me to throw back
Zillions of shades, but not purple.
Writersdigest.com April Poem a Day challenge day 5 – prompt Vegetables
http://www.writersdigest.com/whats-new/2015-april-pad-challenge-day-5/comment-page-8#comment-3528204
THE MARKET STALL
He stood there in his mac with rain
dripping all down his trouser leg
shouting “Please, come and buy again
some of my lovely fruit and veg”.
I hurried by with my head low
well hidden under my brolly
until I saw some mistletoe
next to a small bunch of holly.
And that turned out to be the start
of something that was very big.
I was in the Christmas spirit
so I purchased a little sprig.
In spite of the driving rainfall
I was a most mischievous miss
and I went back to the veg stall
and stole a cheeky Christmas kiss.
That did me a whole lot of good,
being septuagenarian,
now I will be sure to have food
as I am vegetarian.
He is rough around the edges
and I don’t want to be his wife
but I’m guaranteed fresh veggies
and fruit for the rest of my life.
AGGRAVATION
Whirr, whirr, whirr!
Her vacuum machine!
She uses it every day.
The noise drives me mad
but actually I have to say
I’d prefer my pad
to be more serene
but still clean.
Whirr, whirr, whirr!
Her washing machine!
What a dreadful racket that makes
while I try to snooze
and then when it’s over she takes
her stuff out to use
her drying machine.
That’s so mean!
I like radio.
That is on all day
to stop me feeling all alone,
or so they all say.
But constant ringing on her phone,
irritates me so.
That should go!
Can I get some peace?
It’s very hard for me to sleep
soundly as I should
because I always have to keep
aware of no good,
as the house police.
Less noise please!
The very worst thing
that aggravates me
is her perishing computer.
Hours spent that should be
quality time spent together
walking or playing.
Just saying!
Another Doggy Ditty using my theme “Only Human” which I hope to be able to use throughout this April PAD.
http://www.writersdigest.com/whats-new/2015-april-pad-challenge-day-3/comment-page-1#comment-3525214
ABSENTMINDEDNESS
She puts her gold necklace
or her earrings
on the shelf.
But she’s a secret place
where she hides things
from herself.
Like bottles of red wine
or chocolate
or good cheese.
Then when it’s the right time
she’ll fetch them out
just to please.
It is strange, to be sure,
is why it is
possible
she can remember where
are her glasses
not at all
but will never forget
just where her treat
is hiding.
It is well hidden yet
it won’t defeat
her finding. Continue reading
ADDICTION
Seems like such a long time
since she stopped drinking wine.
It was hard, she admits,
and she could not resist
just one “medicinal”
but unforgivable
bottle when she felt low.
But it’s not long to go
when she can drink again.
Amen to Lent. Amen! Continue reading
UNDER THE WILLOW TREE
It was a magical day,
a day to be out at play.
He was bathing in the pool,
splashing about in the cool.
water, without a care in the world.
Continue reading
ARACHNOPHOBIA
I am unable to move, I’m shaking inside.
I just can’t take my eyes off him in case he’ll hide.
He stands motionless, staring at me evilly.
Continue reading
An Elegy to Claude
You were one of our three bantam hens
called Claudia, Clara and Chloe Cluck
and you quickly became the boss
pushing your sisters around in the muck.
REFLECTIONS
Who is that old lady in the mirror?
It cannot be myself.
It must be my mother’s photo
that’s sitting on the shelf.
Now that I’m considered past my working prime
I’m working on a three day week, so now I have more time
to tackle household jobs I could not manage before,
to spend some of my free time going out more
and find something for a non-working woman to do.
But with time on my hands to sort things out Continue reading
A poem from our waitress’s perspective
Just an orange juice they want,
a cup of tea for Mable,
oh, and a jug of water
for the rest of the table.
And one wants an extra plate
to share her lunch with her friend,
and another wants to swap
her chair and sit on the end.
They want to know if they can
have a “pensioner” amount
included in the “specials”
or if we will give discount.
Lunch only costs a fiver
but they will sit there for hours,
moaning about their ailments,
boasting about their flowers.
They’ll argue over the bill
and I have the slightest hunch
that we won’t get a big tip
from these Ladies who Lunch!
!
Why wait until right now?
A bride is just about to make her vow!
Someone I work with is getting married today,
so rain, you can rain now, but then please go away!
Although it is very true that we need our gardens watering,
their wedding plans this sudden shower of rain is slaughtering.
Let this unforecasted shower just be a quick little friendly sprinkle
and stop before the time when their church wedding bells start to tinkle
Rain, you can fall now but then please go away and let the sun back out,
or the blushing bride will get her white wedding dress wet, without a doubt.
They are going to get married in a nearby church here at the stroke of one,
so
lis
ten
up,
get
it
all
over
and
done!
You’re late!
You were supposed to have been born today
but there is no sign that you’re nearly on your way.
You’re still in my womb and in there you want to stay,
but hurry up, my baby, come on out, I pray!
I’m scared!
Continue reading
.
I am now beyond all hope!
There is definitely really no scope
for me leaving that bottle of red wine
until I reach the bottom. I still feel fine.
But then the next morning I feel so bad
with cramp in both legs, pumping blood
and I’m feeling like death warmed up,
until I get a hot, strong, black cup of
coffee and some food inside.
When will I learn to avoid
opening that bottle?
I’m not sure
that
I can
now
my brain has gone.
!
Why wait until right now?
A groom is just about to take his vow!
Someone I work with is getting married today,
so rain, you can rain now, but then please go away!
Although it is very true I well need my garden watering,
their wedding plans this sudden heavy rain is slaughtering.
Let this needed downpour just be a quick little friendly sprinkle
and just before the time when their wedding bells start to tinkle
rain please stop now. Rain please go away and let the sun back out,
or the blushing bride will get her wedding dress wet, without a doubt.
They are going to get married in a nearby church here at half past two,
so
lis
ten
up,
I
beg
of
you.
************
My words seem to have worked – the sun came out again in time for their wedding!
Nimrod was a mighty hunter, so the Bible said,
but like every ancient hunter, he ended up dead.
Nimrod was my mother’s dog, big, black and strong.
Everywhere my mother went, Nimrod would come along.
My mother loved good music, she would listen to Classics FM,
so when my mother died, we chose her favourite hymn.
Elgar composed Enigma Variations, Nimrod was the best.
We played Nimrod at Mum’s funeral, with Nimod’s ashes locked in her chest.
Eleven degrees out in the sun at five o’clock at night?
I found that I definitely hadn’t dressed myself quite right,
when I went out walking with my dog, Myschka
and I kinda wished I
hadna worn so many clothes!
My mail has just arrived, for what it’s worth,
more junk mail than letters to cause my mirth:
double glazing leaflets – two of a kind,
and an advert for a vertical blind;
a bag to hold some charity money,
and a poster for a play that’s funny.
I’m
insane,
it is plain.
I really think
I am on the brink
of a brand new romance.
Shall I take a second chance?
Or will I soon be shedding tears
when it all goes pear-shaped over years?
But if nothing ventured, there’ll be no gain,
or maybe I’ll just end up alone again.
A Rondel Poem
Now I buy groceries on line,
it’s so much easier that way.
When weather’s bad, at home I stay,
and order all my food and wine.
February is here now and the days are getting lighter,
so those of us with SAD syndrome can feel a little brighter.
We’ve got rid of the worst months of our depressing winter gloom,
and now it’s time for us to see garden flowers start to bloom.
My favourite shoes are falling apart,
and I can’t wear them out when I am smart,
but when I’m walking with my dogs I feel
so comfortable, yet they’re down at heel.
Friday 18th
Snow is falling all around.
There’s no birds, no cars, no sound.
No dogs are barking, no caterwauling.
Just lots of snow falling, falling.
Dogs are sleeping on the couch.
Had their walk, their bone, their pouch.
They’ve been out sniffing, been a-peeping.
Now they’re softly sleeping, sleeping.
Trees are glistening with the snow.
Plants are gone, deep down, won’t grow.
The ground is freezing, birds are listening,
All is white and glistening, glistening.
Snow Jan 2013
This Friday we have had some snow!
It absolutely tipped it down.
It covered up the entire town
and there was nowhere we could go.
Okay, it’s New Year’s Day and it’s time for some resolutions,
but I’ve given up making them, I just need some solutions.
I have absolutely no more room in my house for more “stuff”,
and I’ve tried to downsize, but obviously not hard enough.
So this year, I’ll throw away something every single day,
never mind how much I had to pay, or how I’d like it to stay.
As I didn’t use it, play it, wear it or eat it last year,
if I threw it away tomorrow, I should not shed a tear.
I love a frosty Wednesday morning like today under a clear blue sky.
Apart from the friendly robin in the bushes over there,
there’s no-one in the world about except my dog and I,
and our breath is steaming from us both in the fresh and icy air.
Such is retirement on a Wednesday –
almost as good as being a Sunday!
I’ve been out walking with the dog.
It’s cold, it’s damp and full of fog.
Dew drops are dripping from my nose
and I can hardly feel my toes.
“Drink your milk!” our teachers used to say,
but our milk bottle crates had stood all day,
in the years of free milk, out in the sun.
There were bits on the top, yuk – not much fun!
I found a better one. So there!
I’d had much more than my fair share!
You caught him, hook, line and sinker,
but you really caught a stinker!
The truth about retirement is
that it’s not so good as it is cracked up to be.
Everything you want has its limits,
comes with a price and hardly ever free.
I was wandering alone in the park
just before it was getting dark,
when a passing thought came to me
how lucky birds were to be free.
I wanted then to stop and stare
at a pony, and a grey mare,
and I quote a very famous ode
which came into mind as I strode.
I asked aloud, with no-one there,
‘What is this life if full of care?’
I could see the folly at the top of the hill;
I’d been out a while but I’d some time left still,
so with my best foot forward I climbed to the top,
although, I admit it, I had to take a stop.
“I’ve got a good joint of pork for you today”
my friendly butcher down the road used to say.
“I saved it ‘specially for you, my dear,
and some special lamb chops, so never fear,
you won’t go hungry this week, my sweet.”
I’m sitting at my desk again, trying hard not to cry,
waiting for my laptop to restart again so I
can find some amusement. And what’s the reason why?
Quill pens, ledgers – bring them all back,
throw away computers on a disused railway track.
Bury them deep and plant over lots of trees,
or take them to the bottom of the deepest seas!
There he lies again, soaking up the sun
on our kitchen window sill, with a flower vase by his bum!
He doesn’t belong here, he just comes and goes,
leaves his mark in the doorway – it’s my fault I ‘spose!
The clocks have gone back
and we’ve lost an hour at night.
We come home in the dark now
instead of the light.
There’s a big storm a-brewing,
the fallen leaves are a-strewing.
The wind’s howling through the trees.
It’s more than a summer breeze.
It is not much of a laugh.
Doggie Ditties, Potty Poetry and Tall Tales 